Tolmie Peak Lookout is nestled within the northwest nook of Mount Rainier Nationwide Park. On a transparent day, those that hike roughly 4 miles the lookout are rewarded with picture-perfect views, face-to-face with greatness: The mountain stands so shut, it’s as in case you may attain out and contact it. (Don’t strive, although. It’s steep up there.) Glacial lake Eunice, discovered alongside the best way, makes a spectacular resting level or perhaps a vacation spot by itself, as individuals swim in its vibrant blue waters throughout hotter months. The hike has one thing for everybody, from strenuous challenges to average strolls.
My husband, Jon, and I had pushed right here numerous instances. We even introduced our daughter right here for one in every of our first household outings when she was only a few weeks outdated. However I’d by no means been courageous sufficient to trek to the outdated fireplace lookout, perched at practically 6,000 toes.
The explanation? I’ve nervousness.
I need to be adventurous, however racing ideas intrude. Every mile I enterprise deeper into the woods, my pleasure is matched by dread. How can locations that convey me such peace additionally induce such worry? I’ve usually questioned.
So it was with Tolmie Peak. My spinning head all the time discovered a option to persuade me that climbing to the lookout was too far, too excessive, too dangerous.
Now that I’m in my early thirties, I’ve wished to shake off these heavy emotions that forestall me from totally having fun with what I really like. I additionally need my daughter to develop up fearless within the outside. It was time to look Tolmie Peak sq. within the switchbacks and say, “I’m gonna hike you.”
First, although, I turned to Yasith Yasanayake for skilled recommendation. Yasanayake, an REI Experiences information, has led REI Co-op members on dozens of hikes all through the wilderness of the Northeast. His first suggestion for battling nervousness exterior: Don’t go alone.
“There are a lot of variables that may lead somebody to really feel like they’re in panic mode, particularly in an unfamiliar surroundings,” Yasanayake says. “It’s greatest to have individuals you belief close by that will help you work by means of these feelings once they come up.”
In case you battle with nervousness, it’s necessary to acknowledge how you’re feeling earlier than, throughout and even after a hike, Yasanayake says. Occasional nervousness is a standard a part of life, in line with the Nationwide Institute of Psychological Well being, however for individuals with an nervousness dysfunction, the sensation doesn’t go away simply; signs can intrude with each day actions. There are a number of varieties of nervousness problems. For instance, individuals residing with generalized nervousness dysfunction have issue controlling emotions of fear, and restlessness, or the sensation of being “on edge.” Folks with panic dysfunction, in the meantime, can expertise sudden durations of intense worry, discomfort or a way of dropping management even when there is no such thing as a clear hazard. (That is also referred to as a panic assault.)
My nervousness presents otherwise relying on the scenario. Yasanayake advised that thoughtfully processing every a part of the hike because it was underway may assist me discover ways to management my emotions. Right here’s how that appeared in apply for me.
Preparation and Packing
My first step was securing a climbing buddy. I requested Eva Seelye, an journey photographer and my longtime buddy, to assist me navigate to Tolmie Peak. We set a date for my first-ever sundown hike, as a result of I knew it will put me exterior of my consolation zone. Mountaineering after darkish is one thing I’d by no means have agreed to earlier than, not to mention advised. There have been too many unknowns, like the potential for getting misplaced, injured or operating right into a wild animal. However with correct preparation and a educated information at my aspect, the concept appeared so much much less scary.
As I loaded my automotive, I stored one other of Yasanayake’s ideas in thoughts: Adhere to the Ten Necessities as a fail-safe packing information. I tossed these must-haves in my path pack:
- Water (ideally a half liter of water per hour climbing)
- Excessive-protein snacks
- Additional heat socks
- Waterproof climbing boots
- A hat
- A primary-aid equipment
- Additional clothes layers
- A lightweight supply
- Water resistant sunscreen
- A satellite tv for pc communicator
- Pepper or bear spray for self-defense
Earlier than leaving I additionally did some unpacking—that’s, processing the anxious emotions I knew I’d encounter in the course of the hike. I requested for recommendation from my therapist, Katie Ladenburg, LCSW, who has practically a decade of expertise serving to individuals who dwell with extreme nervousness. She first advised that I contemplate all doable coping methods for my psychological and bodily “toolkit.”
“When planning for one thing that makes you anxious, it’s good to discover the idea of being current in your each day life and apply it earlier than you exit and do this factor, so you might have a deal with on easy methods to use that as your first go-to software,” she defined. She suggests having a wide range of instruments at-hand, together with prescribed medicine when applicable. “Don’t overlook,” she added, “probably the most highly effective software is speaking to different individuals about the place you’re going and whenever you’ll be again.”
Verify, examine and examine. I shared my vacation spot with my husband. I double-checked my pack and automotive provides and tucked away my medicine. (Which I take as wanted when panic brews.) Earlier than heading out the door, I grabbed one final merchandise: a journal to put in writing my ideas.
“Taking a second to course of on paper why you’re doing this, whereas acknowledging the dangers and rewards, might help comprise the worry,” Ladenburg advised me. “It helps you lean into doing the stuff you love even once they scare you, so that you’re not a prisoner to that worry. That’s the way you construct confidence—doing one thing arduous and getting by means of it. Writing your emotions down additionally provides you one thing to look again on later, to mirror on the expertise.”

Managing Nervousness on the Path
On a cloudy September afternoon, I met Seelye simply exterior the nationwide park entrance. She’d finished a photoshoot earlier that day, but by some means nonetheless had power. Her power, and her cool, calm and picked up mentality, would get me by means of the hike, with its 1,100-foot elevation achieve. We began round 4pm.
4:47pm
We made good time on the primary mile, taking a water break after about an hour. I jotted down my first journal entry: Feeling excited, sweaty and barely out of breath as we get larger. My lungs had been already feeling it. Then I remembered one thing else Yasanayake stated: Talk what you’re feeling because it’s taking place.
“Permitting your self to voice, ‘I’m kinda freaking out proper now,’ or anything that comes up is important,” they defined. “As a information, it’s on me to facilitate that type of surroundings throughout an REI expertise, but in addition on members to talk up when it’s taking place and never be afraid to take action.”
I advised Seelye the elevation was beginning to get to me, and I wanted extra time. We took a minute to soak within the forest’s silence, gazing on the wall of dense, grey mist we’d be meandering by means of for the subsequent few hours.
5:56pm
An hour later, we reached the crystal-clear water and breathtaking surroundings of Eunice Lake. I appeared to the other shoreline, the glasslike water reflecting the moody sky above.
“There it’s! We’re so shut!” Seelye stated as she pointed towards the fireplace lookout a few mile away. However to me, it would as effectively have been sitting atop Mount Everest. Acquainted, anxious ideas began to creep in. I doubted whether or not I may do that, beating myself up that I struggled with a distance that appeared simple to my buddy. I even tried to chop the journey quick, saying, “Let’s simply eat right here. It’s too cloudy to see something, anyway.”
Fortunately, Seelye wouldn’t let me give up. She agreed that the tower appeared excessive from the place we had been standing, but in addition that it wasn’t so far as it appeared. She’d validated my emotions—however she additionally didn’t let me again out so simply. Her encouragement recalled one other tip from Ladenburg: Remind your self you’re ready. “Give up to that reminder whenever you’re not feeling assured, and attempt to put some belief in your self,” she had stated. “Say, ‘I’m doing this and I’m slightly scared, however it’s greater than seemingly going to be nice.’ Fascinated by the statistics of what number of different individuals have finished one thing comparable might help in these instances too.’”
6:36pm
Feeling intimidated and uneasy, I journaled. The solar will likely be setting quickly. To maintain such intrusive ideas at bay as we hiked the ultimate stretch, I talked Seelye’s ear off and stored a watch on the clouds veiling the mountain.
Immediately, a small, snowcapped ridge peeked out in entrance of us. I felt my nervousness begin fading. Is that this actually taking place? I assumed. Am I about to succeed in my first summit? We picked up the tempo, buzzing with pleasure that we is perhaps minutes away from the view of a lifetime.
7:01pm
With a coronary heart fee as elevated as the bottom beneath us, we turned the final nook—and, miraculously, the clouds had been quickly lifting. There she was, Mount Rainier (Tahoma in Puyallup) in all her glory.
The mountain and surrounding peaks appeared to float on a magic carpet of clouds—a phenomenon referred to as a temperature inversion. I’d by no means been in a spot to see one earlier than. And I undoubtedly wouldn’t have skilled it if I’d let my nervousness win. As I stood in awe at 5,900 toes elevation, I felt on prime of the world in each manner.
I penned one other journal entry to commemorate the second: “Feeling proud, at peace, pleased and … nonetheless scared for the solar to go down.”

7:40pm
Although I wished to dwell on that mountaintop ceaselessly, the longer we waited to descend, the darker it will be. As Seelye helped me get my headlamp on straight, I blurted out, “That is the half I’m most afraid of!” As if on cue, the clouds rolled in, and raindrops hit the again of my neck. I scoured my mind for one more skilled tip that will calm me in the course of the darkish descent. The idea of “grounding” got here to thoughts.
“Grounding is something that brings you again to the right here and now,” Ladenburg had advised me. “This entails completely different types of meditation, like yoga or breathwork—taking a minute to deal with nothing however respiratory,” she stated. It might be so simple as “pondering of a phrase that brings you confidence or stopping to bodily contact the bottom and join with the earth.”
Posing in downward dealing with canine on a downhill slope didn’t appear good, so I as an alternative took a number of deep breaths and focused on the phrase I’d put behind my thoughts for simply this event: “I’m ready, and I’m succesful.”
Between these workouts; specializing in the grime in entrance of me; and sticking near my trusty path companion, I made it down the steep terrain. I adopted my headlamp’s shining beam for 3 winding miles till it met the primary highway, then set free a relieved sigh once I lastly noticed our automotive.
9:03pm
“We did it!” Seelye and I rejoiced as we kicked off our boots and threw our packs to the bottom. “You climbed a rattling mountain,” she jogged my memory, congratulating me on all that I’d overcome. As we pulled out of the park and onto the freeway, I put one final skilled suggestion into apply: Find time for self-reflection.

Reflections of a (Previously?) Anxious Hiker
“The ‘after’ half following an anxious occasion is about making peace with the narrative of what occurred,” Yasanayake says. “It’s acknowledging the great and the dangerous and being humble to the expertise that life has given you, with a view to study from it. Then, it’s pondering by means of issues like, ‘If these anxious emotions got here up, why? When did it occur? Am I OK with that occuring once more, or are there issues I can do otherwise subsequent time to forestall it?’”
Almost each REI Experiences journey Yasanayake leads features a shopper who’s nervous in a roundabout way, even when not everybody chooses to voice it, the information says. It’s completely regular to expertise some nervousness outside. In actual fact, slightly nervousness could be a good factor; it could possibly hold you conscious and observant of your environment. Even Seelye who makes a residing doing rad issues in nature, nonetheless has anxious moments right here and there. “As a lot as I really like sleeping exterior, I’m all the time on excessive alert for any little sound that might imply a big animal is close by,” she admits.
Processing my feelings in the course of the drive dwelling was a significant ending to the day. I considered how my need to discover is stronger than my nervousness, and the way I have to keep in mind that. I additionally thought of how having fun with the outside is as arduous or as simple as I make it. I received’t all the time really feel snug tackling a number of miles on a hike, and I most likely received’t take my daughter on a path like this for a while. Now that I do know I can attain the Tolmie Peak Lookout, although, I’ll attain farther ones, in time. That’s progress sufficient for me.
“It doesn’t should be all slingin’ miles and crushin’ mountains,” Yasanayake says. “Make getting exterior no matter you need it to be.”
The submit I advised my nervousness to take a hike. Right here’s the way it went. appeared first on Unusual Path – An REI Co-op Publication.